Defining the Differences

Baby, I try to look forward , & toward,
But sometimes all I see is before.
The roads well taken, the paths poorly walked,
The twisted & missed turnoffs
The signposts unseen, those ignored, & those I ran down

The lives we lead are the verses of our own songs
Sometimes tones ever sweet, sometimes subdued,
Sometimes fugues of requiem, other times anthems strong
Shaped by the music we heard, & the notes we sang out
And the rare duets that perfectly blended.

When my voice cracks on a note I should not have tried
I am saddened by it, like a student whose brush wavers
In front of the master, knowing that he has failed to learn
And the master’s eyes are pained by its’ imperfection
So that the work entire is diminished in his sight.

When I sing for you, I try to show my love
In the choice of the song, & my devotion to you
Knowing that my voice has faded, where yours has grown
And I wish not to gift you with imperfections
Or with songs that you will not understand.

I listen to the music of your life & hear mine echo
In the distance of memories. The sounds of my childhood,
Sunday afternoon Polka Party, KDKA-AM,
When there was happy music, before anger’s bacchanal,
And I reveled in its’ transitory lifting up of spirit.

How can I gift you with this, so foreign to who you are
So basic to who I am, who I was, & who I shall become?
Music to me now is Celtic, is Native, these
Things I have gathered to me in replacement
Of lost heritage, denied connections, atonal memories

I hear the music of your life, urban & unfamiliar
To me. How can I change my ears to your rhythms,
To live in a world of which I know nothing?
The answer is that I love you, & will step into your heart
And learn its’ beat, & gift to you the purest notes I can craft.

And I will live for the harmonies & forget the dissonance
For love is the truest song we can sing,
And all that is required is that we sing it together
In the key of love, always striving for the pitch
Of complete harmony, falling sweetly upon the ears of God.